Cybelle's Reward

My children had a lot of activity this summer like, studying their previous lessons, making their summer assignments in all subjects, joining their art class and of course helping me doing the household chores.

As already mentioned in my April 15 post, I assigned household chores to them and rate there performance based on the following questions.
1. Did she remember her chores?
2. Did she make her chores well?
3. Did she make her chores with a happy attitude?



In order to motivate them to stick to their chores everyday, I told them that once a month they can go to Play Maze or any other place they like to go just to play and have fun. So that they can see their progress, I make it a point to mark their chart everyday.




Last Sunday, Cybelle got her reward. Since she got a lot of X’s more than the check, instead of treating her to Play Maze, my husband just took her to Novo to buy art stufs, and then to Jollibee in Mandaue proper to dine.

PS: My husband and I explained to her why she couldn’t go to Play Maze, and encouraged her to do better next time.

Disneyland Adventure with my Family

As a little girl, I was an avid fan of Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck and Goofy because they were very funny. Until now that I’m married with three children, I still giggle every time I watch these Walt Disney characters with my children. Like me, all of my children enjoy watching the exploits, jokes and pranks of these three, and the three never fails to make them laugh heartily. And there were even times that I caught them imitating the voices of Donald Duck, Mickey Mouse and Goofy while pretending that they are the Three Musketeers.

After my children’s laughter died down, and they turn their attention to something else, my mind still lingers on the three characters, and on my long cherished dream – to visit Disneyland. Yes, I am still dreaming of going to the fantasy world. But now, not just for myself but also for my family. And I believe that framing my Disney dream into my dream board is the first step towards achieving my dream.

Disciplining My Children, the Blue Slipper Way

I will not say that I am an expert in disciplining children, but I do know a trick or two. With three children under my belt, I did earn a white belt or something in discipline. My children are not saints but I can honestly say that they are not rascals either. Now I will share to you my tricks.

Establish boundaries

I see to it that my children know what is allowed and what is not allowed, and I make sure that they understand why, and what is the penalty for violating Mom’s rules.
Reinforce the boundariesOur children, no matter how adorable they all look like, do sometimes behave like outlaws and deliberately cross the line. I called this disobedience, and this carries with it the maximum penalty. As a mother it is my God-given responsibility to remain consistently steadfast and firm with my ‘NO’ in the face of my children’s pleading, crying, negotiations, etc. and to impose the pre-agreed penalty when necessary.

Discipline to teach

To me, discipline is to teach my child a lesson; it is not to vent my frustration and anger. Of course I am not a perfect mom, I made mistakes from time to time, but I always tried my best to overcome my shortcomings.

Use the blue slipper

At home, disobedience is the worst mistake, and therefore deserves the maximum penalty – the blue slipper. I choose this because it can be painful yet not so hard. The point of inflicting pain is to make sure that they cannot forget their mistake. Let me emphasize that, I don’t discipline my children for childish for breaking a glass because lack of motor control. Disobedience and lack of respect is what I don’t tolerate.

Put a closure

At home, after every disciplinary session I see to it that there is a closure. This is very important part of the discipline process. I did this by talking to my child, explaining to her the consequence of her wrong action to her and to others, telling her that I love her and that I don’t want her to become a bad person, hugging her for the longest time, and praying loudly for her.

An Empty Picture Frame

Today is the 2nd day of the 3-day sale at SM. Like most women and mother in particular, I went there hoping to buy something on a huge bargain.

True enough, there were a lot of people in all forms and sizes crowding in the department stores, boutiques, shoe shops, accessory shops, and diners. Some looked like scavengers, diving and digging into a heap of clothing hoping to find the perfect bargain – great to look at, fits perfectly, good quality at an affordable price. While some looked happy strolling with paper or plastic bags hanging on both their hands, others looked exhausted and confused, unable to decide which to purchase considering their limited budget.

On my part, I knew exactly what I want to buy. While most women flocked to the shoes, bags, dresses, and accessories shops, I went straight to the 3rd floor of SM department store to buy a picture frame.


Why buy a picture frame?

As a mom and a wife, I have a lot of dreams for my family and for myself. For example, I want to go to Disneyland in Hongkong together with my family. Since being a full time mom can make you feel trap inside your home, with no hope of pursuing your dreams in life, you tend to let go of your dreams. So that I won’t forget my dream, I decided to frame these and put the frame in a place where I can see it everyday. This way I keep my dream alive.


In a few days I will post my dream board so stay tune.

The Stickers on the Wall

Being a full time mom is a very satisfying experience, but at times it can be depressing and stressful. I know because I’ve been there many times. And I am sure that if you are a full time mom, you can relate to my sentiment.

In my home, there are many causes that can bug me down into depression like: (1) When I come to realize that the day comes to an end, and yet I haven’t earned a single penny; (2) When some of my friends invited me to go malling in SM, and I can’t go with them because no one will take charge of my children during my absence or worse I had no money even just for snacks; (3) When my husband forgot to give me a call during the day just to say “Hi” because he was busy with his work; (4) When I feel that nobody appreciated the work I’ve done at home; and the list could go on and on…

Before, when I was depressed, I ate and ate without feeling any satisfaction or I just laid down without falling asleep. There were even times that I hosted pity parties, and shed my tears away. When I could no longer bear the pain, I would sometimes call my husband at work to pour out my feelings. The problem was that he could not stay long with me on the phone because he had a meeting or deadline to catch up. This only made me fell worse.

I went like this for years until I discovered the joy of collecting and posting stickers.



Now instead of wallowing in self-pity when I am depressed, I posted stickers around my home, and did other creative activities.

I decorated this white cabinet when I was depressed because I could not go to Super Metro (a department store) because nobody was willing to look after Leyan.

I decorated our wall just above Hummy, our bedroom air conditiner, when I was depressed because I wanted to eat Da Vinci pizza, my favorite, but my allowance ran out.

As full time moms we can never avoid situations and circumstances that can depress us; that's life. But we have a choice, to be a productive and creative full time moms, and gain back our life!

Children's Summer Schedule

It was Sunday right after attending mass in our local church, my husband and I called for a family meeting to discuss a very serious matter. All the members of the Derit family namely Magsy, Cybelle, Leyan, my husband, and I attended. Everybody was very serious.



The topic of the meeting was to discuss the summer activities of the children. We felt that we have to implement a schedule so as not to waste the precious days during school vacation. One of the activities decided was to assign chores to the children.




Since we believe that feedback and reward system is very important to reinforce good behavior, my husband and I devised a daily monitoring chart. Based on the chart, the children are to be rated based on the following questions: (1) Did she remember her chores? (2) Did she do her chores well? (3) Did she do her chore with a happy attitude?

At the end of the day, I will put a check and an X on the chart (see pic above). It’s very important that they should be there when I do the rating so that I can explain to them why I put an X to Cybelle’s chart or a check to Magsy’s chart, for example.

Then once a month they will get a reward based on their rating.

Last Sunday, my husband sent Magsy to PlayMaze Park Mall and they dine in KFC as her reward.





Cybelle will receive her reward by the end of the month.

The Good Old Fashion Cucumber

Bedtime is always a struggle between me and my angels. They will resort to all sorts of childish tactics – pleading, begging, asking the never ending ‘why?’, crying, delaying, ignoring, negotiating, and so on and so forth – just to buy some waking time, leaving me stressed out. Then I discovered the cool and soothing touch of the good old fashion cucumber.


Magsy and Cybelle love sleeping with cucumber on their eyes because it helps them relax and chain their boundless energies; children of their age, Magsy 8-year old and Cybelle is 6-year old, are like the bunny in the battery commercial – they keep going and going and going…until they run out of power and drop. Fortunately, the children find it a treat to wear cucumber in their eyes because it feels like they are inside the saloon having their beauty rest and foot spa. So now it is less stressful to me to put them to bed early, especially when I have a blog to finish.

What if I run out of cucumber?

Then I have to say what every mother would say to their children when they want something done soon, and won’t take a ‘NO’ for an answer: “Because I said so.”

PS: It's better to store the cucumber inside the refrigerator for several hours before using.

The Joys of My Heart

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Hi! My name is Ruveylene and I am a mother of three lovely girls – Magsy, Cybelle, and Leyan. Just like any mom out there, I adored my children and only wants what’s best for them. But being a mother is no easy task since nobody taught us how to raise children. It is for this reason that I started this blog to share the valuable lessons I learned the hard way after eight years of being a full time mother.

As a mother I won’t pretend to be perfect but I tried my best to learn from my mistakes, so that I can become a better mother to my children. I think this is the most important thing that a mother should do.

It is my sincere hope that you all learn something from my heartaches, joy, and experiences of being a loving but imperfect mother. After all this blog is for you, a mother who loves your children but is unsure if you are doing what’s best for them.

So read on and feel free to comment and ask question.